Toddlerpocolypse

Wait...what just happened?

What's the date?

How long has it been?

I have zero excuses for how long I've been away from the blog world....other than I'm a mom of two toddlers, a wife, a full-time job-holder, a dance team coach, a studio dance instructor and that I need sleep in between all of those things.

Life got in the way of my blogging and until I had something worthwhile to say, I didn't really mind it.

This last year has been full of challenges, milestones, new experiences and the beginning of what I'll call, "The End of Down Times".

After Evan was born, I thought, "Man, this kid is easy!" and he was. I assumed that because he had been spent his first few months smiling and coo'ing at us that it would always be that easy. Why did other parents complain? Two kids was a piece of cake. Two pieces of cake, in fact.

Evan grew older and it still was easier than I thought. Colin wasn't jealous and loved to help out (unless Thomas the Train was on...then how DARE you interrupt). Maybe I went into a coma, maybe I got a case of "mommy-brain" or maybe it literally all changed in the blink of an eye, but I can't remember the moment it had gone from being easy to the Toddlerpocolypse.

That phrase sounds creepy, but it's alarmingly accurate. Seemingly overnight, your children turn from adorable smiling babies into wobbling creatures who can barely speak and more often make sounds that mimic demons. They chase after you with their heads that are too big for their body, arms outstretched and remnants of jelly, juice or yogurt dribbling down their chins.

My children started acting like "people", but something was off. Then I realized, it was (here's that word again) the Toddlerpocolypse. A new era had arrived. Gone were the days of children innocently playing on the rug because they had no way to move anywhere else. These children were mobile. They were vocal (sort of). And they were hungry.

Hungry for food, attention, action....you name it. There is no end to the appetite of these small boys. I've done my best to adjust. I carry my weapons at all times: diapers, wipes, apple juice and granola bars. For now I seem to be safe, but I know that in time they'll grow bigger, stronger and yes, even more hungry.

So if you haven't seen me in a while, just know that I am thinking of you and hoping you're well. If you're feeling brave and come to see us, here's some advice: come prepared with an arsenal of hugs, kisses, jokes and 5 Hour Energy Shots. Trust me, you'll need it.